Black Belt Dojo

Con - fidence

As part of the research Liam and I did recently, we asked people what most helped them develop. High on the list was being stretched to do more challenging work.

Self-help books (I've read them all. I am Bridget Jones incarnate.) tell you to 'do one thing a day that scares you'. But I seem to have had quite a few conversations with people recently who just aren't convinced they've got the confidence to take the risk.

Years ago, I read somewhere that the word confidence starts with a 'con'.  As long as you act as if you're confident, nobody knows you're a quivering jelly underneath.

Now I'm probably one of the least confident people you know. They used to have competitions at school to see who could make me blush the most. But ever since I read that book, I found that having an air of self assurance will get me through just about any work-related situation. And nobody seems to notice if I'm feeling totally jittery inside. 

A few years ago I presented at my first major conference. I was absolutely petrified. I'd rehearsed it so many times in my mind I was literally reciting it in my head as I walked from the tube to the hotel. I got the highest feedback scores of anyone at the conference (including Bill Quirke!) and I met a delegate on the tube afterwards who said 'I wish I could be that confident about speaking in public. But I guess you must do this kind of thing all the time.' SO not true. I'd been so nervous I daren't have a coffee in case anyone saw my hands shaking.

In my experience, if you only do the things you're scared of once, you'll still be scared of them afterwards. I find I have to do them over and over again within a fairly short time, until it starts to dawn on me that it doesn't feel so bad any more and I actually seem to be doing it quite well.

I think taking risks is one of the best ways to learn. I've got two things in my work diary in the next couple of months that I'm having palpitations about. I still hate the 'this is like going to the dentist' feeling that I have in the run up. But in the back of my mind, I know it will all be OK, and afterwards that will be another thing I didn't think I could do ... but now I know I can.

So .. what's coming up in YOUR schedule?

Sue

MBTI or NLP?

There's a jargon-filled title for you!

I'm always interested in learning more about what makes people tick, so I've decided I either want to get my Myers Briggs accreditation or become an NLP master practitioner. But I can't quite decide which.

If you're either Myers Briggs accredited or an NLP master practitioner, I'd be really interested to hear how useful (or not) you've found it at work, and in life in general in fact.

Actually I'm slightly slanting towards NLP on the grounds that I've read it can work miracles with phobias. Liam's just called me and the conversation was punctuated with me squealing very loudly because a big spider kept running across the wall. I'm too petrified of them even to get near enough to squash them, so now, would you believe, I daren't go back into my office! That's what made me decide now was the time to write this post. (I've taken my laptop out of the office. Wireless broadband is a wonderful thing ...)

So, if you happen to have any 'dealing with arachnaphobia' tips, NLP people, those are very welcome too. As long as they don't involve actually having to go NEAR any spiders. My unsympathetic, psychiatric nurse best friend just smiles evilly and says 'fight or flight'. She's convinced she just needs to put me in a room full of spiders and I'll either pass out or get over it. I vote for passing out.

Sue

Something to shout about

I had an interview last week. Only for some voluntary work, but I squirmed and had to think for what felt like ages when I was asked the inevitable 'what do you think has been your biggest achievement?' question.  Just when I'd finally managed to drag an answer from the depths, along came 'what are you most proud of?'   (Thinks: 'Don't be ridiculous, there MUST be something! There must be LOTS of things!' whilst failing dismally to think of any, looking v.embarrassed and fidgeting a lot.)

After I'd escaped from the interview I was thinking about how uncomfortable it can be to talk about your achievements.  And as a profession, I don't think we're great at shouting about our achievements in our organisations either.

On Black Belt, when we ask about what's helped people improve relationships with senior leaders and move teams from being thought of as e-mail-sender-outers to trusted advisors, being able to give evidence of a job well done always features. But whilst external consultancies are great at collecting case studies to showcase their wares to the next client, how are you at collecting them to showcase to other people in your organisation?

You know the type of thing consultancies do.  'Organisation X had a big business problem. This is what we did. This is the outcome.  Here's a quote from v.important senior manager talking about how fantastic we were. Wouldn't you like us to do something similarly brilliant for you too?'

Do you take an hour or so to write up your great case studies?  Do you get testimonials from leaders and project teams when they're feeling impressed and showering you with thanks? How easily can you call up examples to show what a difference you can make to a project or a management team? 

We all know how annoyingly tricky it is to get that elavator pitch answer to the 'so what exactly do you do?' question, and all too often people assume that we just 'write stuff'. Having a few examples up your sleeve makes it a lot easier to say 'Look - THIS is the kind of thing I mean.' And from the occasions where I've prepared for 'real', competence-based job interviews, I know it's much easier to shout about what I've achieved when I've got an evidence-based answer ready and waiting.

Just a thought.

Sue

..is there any end to our talents...?

Black Belter Andrew Tait from ABN Amro is looking for  sponsorship for a performance as Louis Armstrong in a 'Stars in their eyes' style event.  Clearly we would like to support anyone who shares the Black Belt ethos that singing in public (no matter how well or badly) is what IC people are made for.

Sadly though, Andrew has said that he is not giving his jazz crooner version of Black Belt anthem 'Angels' (as originally performed by tattoed song-miester Robbie Williams).  Instead he is performing Hello Dolly (I think a Barbara Striesland fright wig would have been perfect..)

Anyway, you can sponsor Andrew here.

The money raised goes to the Richard House children's hospice, an extremely worthwhile cause, and ABN AMRO will match any money raised, i.e. if he raises £1,000 the hospice get £2,000.

Dig deep chums...

Liam

Coconuts & Peaches

A couple of years back, the HR function I was working in went through a major change: As our company became more global, the HR staff became more international, which inevitably led to culture clashes. Over time, it became apparent that a gap between German-speaking and English-speaking associates had opened. Management realized this, and to battle the growing "us versus them" mentality set up cultural communications workshops, which everyone had to attend.

The workshops were great, and helped everyone to understand the inner workings of foreign cultures, and after a year, the acceptance for other nationalities' manners and quirks was a lot higher than before. The German-speaking understood that there were fundamental differences between people from the US and the UK, and the English-speaking started to value Swiss perfectionism in projects.

A Fruity Culture Model

There are a lot of culture models out there, all of them more or less complex and academic. The one that really stuck in my mind from these workshops not only is easy to remember, it also has a delicious fruity flavor: It distinguishes "Coconut Cultures" and "Peach Cultures", and explains why some cultures seem opener or friendlier than others.

People from Coconut Cultures are difficult to approach, distant, cold or even abrasive on first encounters, and, socially seen, a tough nut to crack. You don't make friends quickly in these countries, and you won't be let easily into social circles. As for chatting to strangers in a bar or on the bus: Forget it - smalltalk is frowned upon. However, once you break through the thick shell of the coconut and are accepted into the inner circle, you figuratively "swim in milk": It's an accepting, open, honest environment where you will find warm-hearted friends for live.

Peach Cultures are the exact opposite: You can enter them easily, without much resistance. They accept strangers quickly, and are friendly and forthcoming. You will have little problems to make new friends, and smalltalk is an essential tool to get to know new people. However, every peach has a hard kernel: In Peach Cultures, this kernel is the close circle of family and confidents which only very few people can step into.

Peaches are confused by coconuts because they seem cold and unapproachable. They don't understand that you need to drill through the shell to get into the warm center of social acceptance. Coconuts are enchanted by peaches' openness - and then disappointed if those don't follow up friendly intentions with actions. What coconuts need to understand is that peaches have a very fluid definition of friends, and that friendliness is a starting-point, not an end point.

Coconuts and Peaches in IC

I've always wondered how that model could be applied in internal communications. My guess is, coconut cultures don't respond well to overly enthusiastic marketing campaigns. Social events are harder to organize with them.  Peaches on the other hand possibly place more emphasis on the "fun" elements in IC.

Are you a coconut or a peach? I'd love to hear cultural stories or insights you would like to share!

On coaching

Next week is International Coaching Week.  I'm a big fan of coaching - it's helped me a fair bit over the last few years, so I thought it was worth a mention on here.

I first worked with a coach when my in-house IC role didn't feel right anymore, but I didn't know what I wanted to do instead. She helped me switch from thinking about 'what type of job do I want, and is it or isn't it in IC?' to 'what are the things about work that give me a real high?'  It turned out to be things like having freedom - not having to answer to anyone, being able to work where I want, when I want; making a difference; and lots of things around 'people'.  That's when I took the plunge and left the in-house world. I'd discovered that I still liked IC, I just didn't want the trappings of corporate life anymore.

When I choose a coach, I look for three things:

• Somebody that's similar enough to me that means we have a connection, I can enjoy our conversations and they're not all formal and serious.
• Someone that's different enough from me to give a different perspective and force me out of my comfort zone.
• Somebody that's tough enough to say the things I don't want to hear and not let me off the hook

If you're thinking now's the time to get a coach

1. Think about what you want to get from coaching and write down the criteria for your ideal coach. Do you want a coaching relationship, where the coach will prompt you to come up with your own solutions? Or at least an element of mentoring, where the coach will use industry-related experience to offer advice as well?
2. Ask around for recommendations, either from your personal network or your HR team.
3. Check out people's credentials. Coaching is an unregulated industry - anyone can call themselves a coach. Look for coaches who are trained or accredited by professional bodies such as the International Coaching Federation (ICF), the Chartered Institute of Personnel and Development (CIPD) or the Association for Coaching.
4. Speak to two or three different coaches and choose the one that feels the best fit. You need to feel you can trust them and be entirely honest with them.
5. Be sure you're ready to commit to coaching before you go ahead. It's not a cheap option and it's pointless unless you're serious about taking action.

Sue

PS And the proof of why I love the freedom of non-corporate life. I started writing this about an hour and a half ago. Then my 1 year old godson decided he fancied coming round for a play. Now my living room looks a complete mess and my piano has been subject to a thorough bashing, but it was a very nice way to spend an hour or so. It would never have happened in the office!

Book recommendation...

I've just been asked by a recruiter what books I'd recommend to somone who is an excellent writer wanting to move into IC.  I said she should read anything by Bill Quirke but I was wondering if people had other suggestions....

I'm tempted to add Shel Holtz's Corporate Conversations...

Any other thoughts?????  What did you find useful when you first started????

Liam

Guest Blogger 3

Good day, fellow blackbelts! As the new guest blogger for this month, Sue and Liam put their trust in me to entertain you throughout February. While I do have some experience in blogging, being a guest blogger is a new challenge for me.

For those who don't know me: My name is Timm Suess, I'm Swiss and probably one of the odder blackbelts, as my specialty lies in HR Communication. For the last seven years I've been working in various HR positions at Novartis, one of the big players in the pharmaceutical market, where I've been combining HR content with IC tools to produce campaigns and new channels. Before that, I've been working in HR positions for BrainStore inc., an idea factory, and the Basel City Police Department.

In my spare time, I enjoy photographing abandoned factories, writing my own blog, The Honeyjar, playing the Asian Board game Go and drinking lots of green tea. Currently, my fiancé and I are planning our two weddings, one of which is due this summer. Oh, and that's me on the picture, in my younger years (note the vintage smurf t-shirt and the fashionable man-bag).

As Liam knows, exploring new possibilities for internal communications is one of my passions: Call me a geek, but I believe that the future holds much more in store for IC than corporate blogs and instant messaging. My first question to you is: Do you think that for internal communications, new technologies make things easier or more difficult? Is IC profiting from increased degrees of freedom technology offers, or do these degrees of freedom stifle communications because of their complexity?